TRIGGER Pull

I've stated before that I like to run dark, gritty games. There's something special about facing the inherent nihilism of the world, about staring the abyss in the eye and daring the mofo to eyeball you back, that I find oddly confirming. I tell dark tales to my group so that afterwards we can appreciate the light.

As is often the case, these grim tales tend towards adult themes and content, violence and depravity that lurk in the darker recesses of the id and ego. I do not tell tales of torture porn, as I find that distasteful, but I don't shy away from darker elements that have a narrative purpose. Amongst friends who've known each other for years, who kind of know what makes the others tick, you can get a feel for what you're group will or will not be comfortable with, and can tailor accordingly. When telling tales like that, horror tales, you want to edge towards the comfort border, but you do not want to run across it all willy nilly.

But what do you do when you haven't known members of your group for that long? Or when your group is mixed company? How do you know you can tell a horror story without crossing the lines with someone, without triggering some sort of deep seated reaction in them, or just plain old disgusting them? The answer is very simple. You communicate.

My group is made up of myself and seven other people. Two of those individuals I've known for and gamed with for eighteen to twenty years. We've run some gritty games in the past, and I don't worry too much about them. However, a third guy in the group, my friend's son, I've known for eighteen years (since he was born), but I've only really interacted and gamed with him for about two years. The additional four members of the group, I've known for two years or less, and they include a group member's fourteen year old son and a woman. So in essence, over two thirds of my group, I don't know what really makes them tick inside. Also, I run the risk of offending parents if my story has overly questionable content.

When I decided I wanted to run grimdark games for this group, I wasn't sure how to go about doing it. I figured I'd have to keep it somewhat toned down and safer than I'd intended. This is actually an okay method!  Most stories you want to tell, you can tone down the darkness and still get the point of the story across. If you're ever in doubt about what you can, "get away with," err on the side of caution. It's better to tell a watery story than it is to risk severely offending someone you're trying to entertain.

Fandible.com is an actual play podcast, and they have an effective way of warning listeners about impending questionable content. While they did not come up with the idea, Fandible is the first group I've seen make use of 'trigger warnings.' In essence, these are blurbs about the type of questionable content, informing listeners in case they don't want to hear stories involving said content. This works well for my group because we maintain a GroupMe site for our games, and we can discuss what's going to happen in the games (no spoilers!) before we get together. I need to point out, when you use a trigger warning for an upcoming session, make sure you allow for feedback from the group, and allow for venues of private discussion. Let them know if the trigger can be altered, or if it can't, let them know they may need to sit that session out. Make sure the gamers know you're open to communication! For instance, if you're going to run a game that will include child abuse, and you have a gamer who doesn't want to take part, they need to know that they can tell you why that is, if they choose to do so. If that gamer was abused as a child, they may not want to relive certain memories. Or they may want to take part in the game, but they want to discuss with you how it affected them so that you can avoid certain things, or even play up certain things if they want to try to work through an issue. I cannot stress this enough.... Communicate! Always be willing to communicate.

When it comes to running questionable content, this is my commandment... Do not glorify the darkness. For example, don't tell a story that includes animal cruelty just so you can run a scene where characters get to torture puppies. We shouldn't revel in the shadows, we should hold a candle up to them and examine them for what they are. Also be respectful of your players. If you have a game where a sexual assault is going to take place, do NOT do that on "camera." Keep as much questionable content as you can off camera, and tell only enough to get the point and mood across. No more than that, otherwise you start running into torture porn territory, and that doesn't work for me. Also, if said content involves a character directly, discuss the events with the player before you play them. This is important. You and the player need to agree on what's appropriate and what's not. This may mean giving that player some spoilers, but better that than irrevocably offending the player.

After the game is complete, everyone should take time to decompress and discuss, as needed. It's natural for gamers to step into the shoes of the character, to become them, and to feel the emotions the character would feel. Because of this, you may need to take some time at the end of the session to help everyone become grounded in reality again, or to work through whatever emotions they may be feeling. The gaming table should be a safe place for everyone to discuss what they're going through, without fear of ridicule. If you have gamers who can't respect that, you may not need them at your table.

To summarize, there are about four steps for running triggering content. Decide if the story demands that type of content. Warn your players of impending trigger content, and communicate with them about it if needed. Respect the content and the players, and show just enough content to get the story across. Decompress after the story, and give everyone the chance to find their balance, and discuss the ramifications of the content if needed.

These are merely my suggestions for running mature content, though I think they're pretty good ones. I hope that you can use since of these hints to gain insight into how you can run more mature themes, and I wish you luck in doing so.  Remember, while we may walk through the shadows, it just takes a little light to find our way through.